The Art of Holding Back

The Art of Holding Back to Gain Men’s Respect

In order to truly attract men, you must always remember your high value and remember to hold yourself in high value. This means that since something of high value is ‘not easily attained,’ you’ve got to hold back in the beginning of relationships. Hold back a little on confessing your feelings toward him. Hold back from making plans so readily with him or being so accommodating and available. Hold back from sexual behaviors as well. Don’t let him ‘get’ you so easily. Remember, the girl he’s going to be inspired to commit to is the girl that gives him a good chase, that makes him work for it (but demonstrates enough value so that that ‘it’ is worth him working for)  And that girl should be none other than you. You are valuable enough of a ‘prize’ for him to work for. So demonstrate that.

Demonstrate the Art of High Value & Holding Back by:

-Having healthy boundaries & tactfully letting him know when he’s crossed them
-Emotionally and with your Feelings. Not exclaiming that you’re ‘gaga’ over him in the     beginning; leaving him guessing a little.
-Holding back sexually in the beginning
-Retaining your ‘Mystery’ element. Not letting him totally figure you out yet.
-Holding back with your Availability – Establishing your Scarcity

Aside from just holding yourself back because you truly are valuable, holding yourself back a little also retains that sense of mystery. And having a sense of mystery is one of the key ingredients that creates—and sustains—attraction. Mystery intrigues us. Giving yourself up too easily or making it known that you like him so quickly diminishes any sense of mystery for him. If he knows he’s got you gaga already or if he knows he’s got you all figured out, then what more is there for him to work for? Would the game hide-and-go-seek be any fun at all if at the first sign of the seeker’s difficulty, you pop out and reveal yourself? No, that ruins the fun! And isn’t that quiet guy at your work just a little more sexy because you don’t know what he’s all about?  So, holding back a little and giving that sense of elusiveness not only increases your perceived value, it enhances that mystery element that makes him want you that much more. Holding back gives guys that guesswork and challenge and mental stimulation that they love and crave. That ‘does she or doesn’t she want me’ triggers excitement for him, and holding back is the fuel that drives men wild with strategies to win you over. The key is to always leave him wanting more.

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